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Home/ The Selfish Gene/ Chapter 38

“You have made me so confused. You put so much effort into him. I thought you at least… liked him a bit.” The corners of Zhou Jiyu’s mouth twitched and he could no longer laugh.

Like Ji Chenfeng? Thoughts spread like tentacles in the sulcus of the brain, and as soon as they tried to touch this fresh idea, they were electrified by the abnormal current it released, making them cringe with disgust and unwilling to approach again.

How could I possibly like a man?

“It’s just a man’s desire to conquer, not to mention liking. It’s just like…” I searched for a suitable metaphor to describe my relationship with Ji Chenfeng more accurately. “Just like mountain climbing satisfies human beings’ desire for exploration and conquest of nature, but in the end, no one would really marry a mountain.” Of course, you must get married to a woman.

“Does he have no doubts about you?” Zhou Jiyu asked.

“Doubts? No, because I have helped him a lot, he can be said to have great trust in me. When he is angry, I can just coax him with a few words and he will believe all kinds of outrageous things.”

“It seems that…he has completely fallen into your trap.”

Right now, Ji Chenfeng was in the waiting room more than ten meters away, with only a few walls between us. At this distance, I was explaining to another person how he is addicted to and dependent on me, declaring my sovereignty over him, making me feel a different sense of satisfaction.

“Thanks to Dr. Zhou’s guidance.” I smiled with some pride.

Due to Zhou Jiyu’s poor health, he only talked for more than ten minutes and gave me some sleeping and sedative drugs, so the session ended early.

That’s just great, there’s no need to make Ji Chenfeng wait too long. What should we eat on this rare weekend? French cuisine, Japanese cuisine, or hot pot?

Or go back to the hotel to eat and do something else before the clock strikes midnight…

“The famous psychologist Jung believed that the composition of personality is divided into three structures.” As I put on my coat and prepared to leave, Zhou Jiyu’s voice sounded slowly from behind like a weak ghost, “The surface layer is personal consciousness, such as emotions and memories; the bottom layer is collective unconsciousness, which can also be regarded as instincts engraved in genes; and the middle layer is personal unconsciousness, usually a manifestation of a certain complex.”

“Complexes are shaped by the loss or pain of buried memories, such as the perfection complex, the inferiority complex, the father complex, and… the hero complex.”

I straightened my collar and looked at Zhou Jiyu inexplicably: “What?”

“Do you remember? I said before that I abandoned my lover many years ago.” He sat behind his desk, with cold sweat dripping from his forehead.

“Remember, what’s the problem?”

“It’s abandonment, but it’s also running away. Not long after we were together, I felt the pressure. Many times he didn’t treat me as a lover, I was more like… a sculpture that needs to be respected. He worshiped me and got some kind of peace of mind from me. I was his ‘hero’ and all of his feelings for me were built on the help I once gave him.” 

Zhou Jiyu gradually got to the point, “But I’m actually not. I’m neither selfless nor brave, nor always considerate of others. Every day, I put on the mask of a hero and disguise myself as someone else, afraid of being discovered by him all day long… This kind of life was too tiring, so I ran away.”

Thinking that he was reminding me to put on my mask and avoid being discovered by Ji Chenfeng, I sneered disdainfully and made some sharp comments on his past escape behavior.

“I really can’t tell that you were such a coward in the past.”

So what if he discovered something? As long as he is completely tamed, even if my true colors are accidentally exposed one day, he has become a dodder who relies on me. Would he really be able to leave me?

Where can he go without me?

“I am indeed a coward.” Zhou Jiyu leaned back in his chair, showing a forced and ugly smile, “I hope your mask never falls off.”

Today’s Zhou Jiyu was really weird. Did he eat something wrong?

Feeling that his words were somewhat unlucky, I ignored him and turned the handle of the door to leave.

I could no longer stay in the Zheng family’s hotel, so the next day, I found an agent to look at a house. By the afternoon, I directly signed a contract for a brand new apartment near Fly City. Due to the poor geographical location, the monthly rent was not even one-tenth of the hotel before.

It’s not like Ji Chenfeng hasn’t asked me why I don’t live back in my previous apartment. I told him that it was too far away from his home and was inconvenient, and I also wanted to be closer to him. After hearing this, he didn’t ask any more questions.

The new apartment was really far away from the city center. Every morning when I go to work, I will be annoyed by the traffic jam on the overpass. But as soon as I open the door and look at the hot food on the table, as well as Ji Chenfeng’s busy figure in the kitchen and the spotless house I am most accustomed to, all of the irritability that had risen since stepping out of the house in the morning will dissipate in an instant.

Moreover, it may be due to a balanced diet or a regular schedule, but even the insomnia that has plagued me for many years has improved. In the past, I would need at least two sleeping pills to fall asleep, and I would still wake up in the middle of the night. Now, only one pill can help me sleep until dawn.

Besides attending Gu family’s family banquets from time to time, or taking Gu Ying and Sang Zhengbai to dinner, my life has entered an unprecedented stage where I was very comfortable in all aspects.

It was so comfortable that even Tang Bian marveled at how good-tempered I have been recently, as if I have become a different person.

“Master, you are truly in high spirits these days and your whole complexion has improved. It seems that it’s really different when you have the nourishment of love.”

Tang Bian bent over slightly and stood beside me, putting the documents in his arms on the table in front of me one by one. After I finished signing one, he would take it aside and hand over the next one for me to sign. This was like an assembly line operation, increasing work efficiency.

“Did your mother ask you to inquire about my private life?”

Tang Bian choked and said with an aggrieved face: “No, she hasn’t talked to me recently. Young Master, don’t be so defensive about me. I am loyal to you and won’t harm you.”

He is not loyal to me, he is loyal to the “young master of the Sang family”. One day when I am no longer Sang Nian, he will no longer retain his loyalty to me.

The tip of the pen drew a black arc on the paper and stopped suddenly. I checked the document, picked it up, and asked Tang Bian: “Why don’t you have Peng Fan’s signature?”

Peng Fan is the Deputy Director of the Investment Department, and before I joined in, he was the most promising person to sit in the position of Director. A top-notch student from a prestigious university, with high IQ, EQ, and a flawless demeanor. He could also be considered respectful in front of me.

If it was Zheng Jieyuan, that idiot, he would definitely treat such a guy as a close subordinate. Without doubt, he would continue to delegate power and eventually make him a listed director. 

However, I can tell with my toes that he is only respectful to me on the surface, but in his heart, he must really want me to make a mistake and be transferred to another department by Sang Zhengbai, or wished for me to continue to be a good-for-nothing young master.

Tang Bian glanced at the document and said, “Peng Fan went out for business and is not in the company. This is a very urgent document and needs to be signed today.”

It was a document that confirms the location of the products. The position of different brand products in the shopping mall is not fixed. If the performance is good and a more suitable position is available in the new year, the brand will often choose to change the position. Low-end shopping malls aim to attract brands to settle in, but in high-end shopping malls, once they have a vacant space, it will become a fragrant steamed bun in the eyes of the brands, and they will try their best to occupy it for themselves.

Sang Zhengbai has gone through decades of struggle, starting from food sales and developing Zhengyi Group to its current scale, not only in the food and retail industry, but also in the real estate and financial industries.

Zhengyi Square in Hong City is the core industry of the Sang family, located in the downtown CBD, following a high-end and exquisite route, with all of the first-tier domestic and foreign brands settling in. In such a mall, the audit of every brand that enters is extremely strict, not to mention the location on the first floor by the escalator.

“Moyue, this brand…is a domestic women’s clothing brand, right?” I had some impression of the brand name on the document. I had come into contact with this company before when I was in Alia. The reputation has always been good. In the past two years, the IPO was also successful in the Hong Kong Stock Exchange. The external image has always been high-end and fashionable, and its marketing is in place too. This brand will not disgrace this spot.

“A lot of people are vying for the spot A1-12, and Mobis seems to be paying attention too.”

Mobis is a new fashion brand that has emerged in recent years. It has eccentric designs and is very popular among fashionistas. Any doll it launches will be sold for tens of thousands of yuan.

This kind of brand is just like stock trading. It is currently in the limelight and customers will naturally come in like clouds. However, if the market goes bad one day or some negative news comes out, it will immediately become worthless.

After hesitating for a moment, I still signed the confirmation document for Moyue.

As the director, I naturally have the final say. Based on my considerations, Moyue is more suitable for this position, there’s no surprise in that.

…..

Just standing outside the door, I could smell the fragrant aroma of rice emanating from the house. What did Ji Chenfeng cook today? It feels like his cooking skills are getting even better lately, and the food outside has almost become impossible to eat.

Opening the door, the warm air accompanied by the aroma of food rushed towards my face. 

Two kittens, one white and one orange, were rolling around and playing on the carpet in the living room. Hearing the sudden sound of the door opening, they were startled and ran away like reflexes, fleeing back to the pet box placed in the corner.

After changing into slippers, I took off my coat and threw it on the sofa. Then I went to the kitchen and hugged Ji Chenfeng from behind who was preparing food. When he turned his head and looked over, I leaned forward and kissed his lips.

It’s similar to saying hello and telling him I’m back, but the kiss didn’t last long— since the last time we kissed and entangled from the kitchen to the bedroom, a pot of food ended up becoming charred, triggering the smoke alarm. So Ji Chenfeng is very restrained in this regard.

“Did you bring the cats back?” The lips parted, but my arms were still wrapped around his waist.

“Hmm, they were brought back after they were weaned. I will be responsible for taking care of them from now on, so you don’t have to worry.” He turned his attention back to the pork rib soup he was cooking, “Go and wash your hands. It’s time to eat.”

After kissing the side of his face, I turned and went to the bathroom.

After I finished my meal, Ji Chenfeng washed all the dishes and made me a cup of digestive tea before leaving.

“Then I’ll leave first.” He picked up his coat on the sofa and bid farewell to me.

“By the way, my dad wants me to have dinner with him tomorrow, so you don’t have to prepare dinner…” I stopped teasing the two kittens and looked at him.

Ji Chenfeng didn’t reply to me immediately. He just stared at another coat on the sofa in a daze, it was my coat.

Do you like it so much? Do you want to smell it again? There’s really nothing I can do about him. Isn’t he the type who would collect my used tissues and reminisce about them every day?

“…Okay.” Ji Chenfeng came back to his senses, put on his coat, and walked towards the door.

As if nothing had happened, I continued teasing the cat, but then I saw that he was really leaving, so I immediately stopped my movements and chased him to the door. 

Just as he opened the door, I grabbed his neck and asked him in a dissatisfied manner: “Dr. Ji, didn’t you forget something?”

He held my waist and was stunned for a moment, with a hint of doubt in his eyes.

Seeing that he really didn’t remember anything, the raised corners of my lips gradually lowered and I let go of his neck. Suppressing my displeasure, I planned to go back and continue teasing the cat.

This feeling of being the only one who remembers it and the other person doesn’t even take it seriously was really unpleasant. Have you ever recognised your identity? Even I remember this, so how can you not think of it at all when I remind you?

I turned around angrily, and as soon as I took a step, my wrist was grabbed by Ji Chenfeng from behind.

With a light smile and without any explanation, he proved with his actions that he hadn’t really forgotten. He pulled me back into his arms, lowered his head, and accurately kissed my lips, giving me a farewell kiss.

That’s right. Closing my eyes, I hugged Ji Chenfeng’s neck. You should say hello when you come home, and you should say goodbye when you leave…

***

“I heard that you gave the position of A1-12 to Moyue?” Knocking on the door, Peng Fan pushed open the door of my office and barged in without waiting for me to respond.

I stopped the pen in my hand, leaned back in my chair, and asked him what the problem was.

“How can the popularity of a domestic women’s clothing brand be compared with that of an international fashion brand? I have promised Mobis that position a long time ago.” Peng Fan tore through the disguise he had been pretending in front of me for many days. Whether his tone or expression, he was no longer respectful and polite.

“So what?” I said nonchalantly, playing with the pen in my hand, “Have you signed the contract in black and white?”

Listening to my rhetoric, Peng Fan’s face turned blue and white, and it took him a while to utter one word with difficulty: “…No.”

“That’s fine. Go out and remember to knock on the door next time.”

“But haven’t we signed a contract with Moyue? Mobis is definitely more generous than Moyue in terms of rent and discount rates, and it can bring more young customers and fresh blood to our mall!” He slapped his hands on my desk, his tone unable to hide his anxiety, “Moyue is just a low-end domestic women’s clothing brand. Who knows them internationally? Mobis is a hundred times more famous than them.”

“Will Mobis bring fresh blood or fresh scalpers?” Seeing that he was acting so rudely, I looked at him coldly, “I don’t want the customers in a high-end mall to see a large number of scalpers arguing in the waiting line every day, nor do I want them to be stuck in that position and affect the experience of other customers.”

Peng Fan seemed to find it difficult to communicate with me: “You, you are just messing around!”

“I am your superior, and I have already made my decision, so there is no room for you to comment.”

“Then let’s go to Mr. Sang’s place and let him judge to see which one of us is right.” He heavily slapped my table again.

“Do you think this is a children’s fight? If you can’t beat me, you will go to the teacher to seek justice, right?” Leaning forward, I raised the pen in my hand and stabbed it down without blinking.

Peng Fan subconsciously withdrew his hand and watched in horror as the sharp pen tip plunged into the wooden desk. He stuttered for a moment: “You, you…”

“Next time, it won’t just be stuck on the table.” I raised my chin towards the office door and said, “Get out, you can go and complain to my father.”

Peng Fan was so angry that he held his wrist and left my office with a troubled expression on his face.

I have a premonition that having dinner with Sang Zhengbai tonight will affect my appetite, after all, it’s always the same. I thought it would be Peng Fan’s fault this time, but I was wrong this time.

Sang Zhengbai was not very angry that I insisted on my own idea and gave up the prime position to Moyue. Instead, he praised me for having ideas and doing a good job.

“But you still need to improve your skills. It’s too rough.” Sang Zhengbai said, “You can use your mouth, but you are never allowed to use your hands. Do you understand?”

It’s already pretty good that I didn’t get scolded, and it’s not easy to ask him for too much.

“I understand.” I agreed happily.

A rare harmonious meal was about to end perfectly. Sang Zhengbai wiped his mouth with a napkin and carefully wiped his fingers. He took out a small red velvet box from the inside pocket of his suit and handed it to Tang Zhaoyue on the side.

When I saw that box, my heart thumped, feeling a bit uncomfortable.

“You and Gu Ying have been getting along for a while…”

Tang Zhaoyue slowly walked over and handed the small box to me at the other end of the dining table. Holding my breath, I opened it, and there were indeed two silver plain rings inside.

“This is the ring I used when your mother and I got engaged back then. It’s time to discuss your engagement ceremony with Gu Ying.”

I raised my head and looked at Sang Zhengbai who was speaking. My mind was still in a state of confusion, not expecting that this day would come so quickly.

“We’ve only gone on a few dates, and the total time we spent together is even less than twenty-four hours.”

Sang Zhengbai was unmoved: “You will marry her anyway. What difference does it make if you get engaged early or later? The Gu family is very exclusive, and it is difficult for others to break into their circle. The sooner you become one of their own, the better you can get in touch with their resources.”

From my heart to my throat and eyes, it felt as if I had been blocked by a stone, feeling heavy and suffocating. I should be really lucky that he didn’t show me this right from the beginning, otherwise I wouldn’t be able to eat a bite of today’s meal.

The silver ring, after decades of testing, has many scratches on its surface and has long been dull in color. However, I still find it dazzling, and even looking at it again can cause me nerve pain.

Sang Zhengbai’s voice continued: “Developing Zhengyi Group into a global enterprise is also your mother’s wish. You told me that you will not let me down again.”

It was clearly just a sound, but it seemed to have condensed into a solid entity, pressing down on me like a huge mountain, making it difficult for me to breathe. I couldn’t even move my gaze away from the ring.

Yeah, I can’t let him down anymore.

I am Sang Nian, son of Sang Zhengbai, and this is how my life should be. Marry a woman of similar family background, have children, inherit the family business, make friends with powerful people, and live a luxurious life. This is my life, the life that belongs to Sang Nian.

In this case, why should I hesitate?

Closing the ring box with a snap, I held it tightly in my hand.

My palm was stabbed with a dull pain by the not-sharp angle. I lowered my eyes and said in a deep voice, “I understand, father.”

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